Monday
5/18/05
"...he labors in vain and hypocritically in the vineyards of equality." *
It often occurs to me that there are countless advantages to being an adult rather than the child I used to be. Children are, after all, subject to the whims of chance and happenstance just as are adults, yet children are also obligated to navigate the oft-opaque world of rules and regulations created long ago by adults in an equally opaque process of reasoning and justification. Opaque enough, I might add, that much of the logic behind many standard parental rules still elude me at the frighteningly adult age of forty.
In any case, as a tot I was lucky indeed to have two pretty sharp, clear thinking parents who always did their best to make sure that the world of rules and regulations was as un-opaque as possible. Or less cloudy. Clarified? How about transparent? Oh, all right, transparent. They did their best to make the logic behind how the world should work transparent. When at home, for instance, if they promised we would do something or go somewhere, by golly that promise was kept each and every time.
Likewise, if they promised that I was going to be punished after school for some idiotic thing I had done, by golly I got punished after school. Couldn't be clearer.
And complimentary to home life, whenever we were out and about, my folks consistently treated others just as they expected to be treated. As such, each and every social situation was all about Please and Thank You, and not only did I learn that one always arrives five minutes early for an appointment, but also that tipping is based on the effort put in by a server rather than whether we thought the green beans might be a little over-done.
In short, unlike many parents I see today, mine didn't just talk the talk, but they, as expressed in the vernacular, walked the walk.
That said, here comes my big confession for the week: I am, on occasion, guilty of not walking the walk. Sure, the boys and I mostly have the social stuff down pat and around here a promise is a promise; yet when it comes to being both organized and tidy, I'm a complete hypocrite. There, I said it.
For instance, if I had a nickel for every time I gave the lads a hard time about leaving their clothes on the bathroom floor only to realize that underneath each soiled pile of Under-Roos was a lost section of my day-old newspaper... well, I'd have a pocket full of nickels.
And as often as not I'm all over the two of them like ugly on an ape about learning to pay attention to the time and organize themselves better... so guess who just spent the last fifteen minutes staring out the window while absentmindedly scratching his butt? Why yes, that would in fact be... me. A quarter of an hour gone with nothing to show for it. Except that my ass does feel a bit better, thank you. But I digress.
Anyway, now that I've mulled all this over, I figure I still have a year or two to change my errant ways before the lads get savvy to all this parental hypocrisy of mine. Yup, I'd better not waste any time getting my ticket for the Redemption Express, because if I can't change by then I'll run the risk of becoming just like every other ethically challenged parent who resorts to the would-be nuclear option of behavior modification: "Do as I say, not as I do."
Eeew. Gives me the willies just thinking it.
*Adam Clayton Powell Jr.
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"...he labors in vain and hypocritically in the vineyards of equality." *
It often occurs to me that there are countless advantages to being an adult rather than the child I used to be. Children are, after all, subject to the whims of chance and happenstance just as are adults, yet children are also obligated to navigate the oft-opaque world of rules and regulations created long ago by adults in an equally opaque process of reasoning and justification. Opaque enough, I might add, that much of the logic behind many standard parental rules still elude me at the frighteningly adult age of forty.
In any case, as a tot I was lucky indeed to have two pretty sharp, clear thinking parents who always did their best to make sure that the world of rules and regulations was as un-opaque as possible. Or less cloudy. Clarified? How about transparent? Oh, all right, transparent. They did their best to make the logic behind how the world should work transparent. When at home, for instance, if they promised we would do something or go somewhere, by golly that promise was kept each and every time.
Likewise, if they promised that I was going to be punished after school for some idiotic thing I had done, by golly I got punished after school. Couldn't be clearer.
And complimentary to home life, whenever we were out and about, my folks consistently treated others just as they expected to be treated. As such, each and every social situation was all about Please and Thank You, and not only did I learn that one always arrives five minutes early for an appointment, but also that tipping is based on the effort put in by a server rather than whether we thought the green beans might be a little over-done.
In short, unlike many parents I see today, mine didn't just talk the talk, but they, as expressed in the vernacular, walked the walk.
That said, here comes my big confession for the week: I am, on occasion, guilty of not walking the walk. Sure, the boys and I mostly have the social stuff down pat and around here a promise is a promise; yet when it comes to being both organized and tidy, I'm a complete hypocrite. There, I said it.
For instance, if I had a nickel for every time I gave the lads a hard time about leaving their clothes on the bathroom floor only to realize that underneath each soiled pile of Under-Roos was a lost section of my day-old newspaper... well, I'd have a pocket full of nickels.
And as often as not I'm all over the two of them like ugly on an ape about learning to pay attention to the time and organize themselves better... so guess who just spent the last fifteen minutes staring out the window while absentmindedly scratching his butt? Why yes, that would in fact be... me. A quarter of an hour gone with nothing to show for it. Except that my ass does feel a bit better, thank you. But I digress.
Anyway, now that I've mulled all this over, I figure I still have a year or two to change my errant ways before the lads get savvy to all this parental hypocrisy of mine. Yup, I'd better not waste any time getting my ticket for the Redemption Express, because if I can't change by then I'll run the risk of becoming just like every other ethically challenged parent who resorts to the would-be nuclear option of behavior modification: "Do as I say, not as I do."
Eeew. Gives me the willies just thinking it.
*Adam Clayton Powell Jr.
